If the sun comes up tomorrow, thank us!
We're the guys enforcing the laws of nature.

The following text is an excerpt from the posthumorously released manuscript, "Memoirs of a Sci-Cop: 101 Things I Did To Save the Earth" by a former Sci-Cop known as Agent Zeta. You should have already reviewed the "Introduction to Sci-Cops".

Selected Graphics from
The Memoirs of Agent Zeta

Agent Zeta's Badge

"The Force assigned me badge number 239, but later I got to choose my own as a perk for clearing out a gang of zombies from the New York subway system. I love my badge - gives me a real buzz to watch faith healers think about it. A few never got it, though. You might say I lost my patience with them."

Examples of Confiscated Devices

Power converter of Sam Lakolin's 1969 time warper

Bandit Researchers Studying Fuel Additives for 100 MPG Gasoline

Core of the Ectoplasm Capture Device Illegally Used in Ghostbusters

Astral projection enhancer from Shirley M.'s garage
(Alien-Human Mind Link??)

NASA's Tachyon Drive for Hyperspace Communications

"What a shame it was to see the governments own scientists trying to short change the laws of nature. The top dogs said it was all a mistake, just a junior scientist with an unexpected breakthrough. Right. We keep our eye on NASA all the time now. We usually break into the labs and rough people up around holiday times just to keep them honest."

Linguistic Interface Allowing Camels to Speak Arabic

"I wasn't sure what law of nature this violated, but everyone knows camels can't talk. Probably something to do with the Pauli exclusion principle. Anyway, we jailed a sheikh and had to put twelve camels to sleep. What a shock, finding animal rights activists in Saudi Arabia. The locals wouldn't believe that we were French tourists, just shooting up some camels for fun. They just assumed that only Americans would do that kind of thing. I hate stereotypes. The embassy took some heat for a few days, but it boiled over."

Intro to Sci-Cops

Beam back to Jeff Lindsay's planet


Curator: Jeff Lindsay   Contact:
Last Updated: Sunday, November 26, 1995
Created Sept. 20, 1995.
URL: "http://www.jefflindsay.com/SciCopsArt.shtml"